Finding Neverland

What does adulthood mean? There is definitely more to it than just reaching a certain age and physical, mental and psychological development. I wonder if the whole adult mindset just sort of got downloaded into your brain automatically when you reach certain triggering life events like reaching a certain age, gaining employment etc, or if it requires a conscious decision on one’s part to start ‘acting like an adult’. But then again, what does the whole adulthood thing mean?

I always get a polite smile whenever I tell people that I feel and think the same way I did ten years ago. I still listen to the same kind of music, watch the same kind of TV shows and movies, eat the same kind of food, and read the same kind of books and magazines. I also think about doing the same kind of activities, except that I have neither the time nor the necessary accomplices. There is no reason for any of these to change just because I am twenty-seven instead of seventeen.

My age is one of only two things that always remind me of my legal adult status. The other is when I look in the mirror. Even then, I always have to calculate in my head every time someone asks how old I am. Perhaps the fact that I still live with my parents, have no girlfriend, and have a Gundam figurine sitting on my office desk all have to do with the whole situation. Just to be clear though, I see nothing wrong in any of them.

My sister, who is planning to get married, asked my mother why I ‘have no friends’. She was really asking why I do not have a girlfriend. As if my mother, aunts , and colleagues are not enough, now my sister too? Is it my fault that I like my quiet time alone doing my own stuff and hate the awkwardness of meeting strange people and large crowds? I think I fully understand the whole love, relationship and marriage thing pretty well. I am open to the possibility; I am just not looking.

Suapi in his last entry touched on the subject of personal economics and finances. I suppose it is the adult thing to do, to think and worry about buying property, supporting family, retirement etc. I guess it is the responsible thing to do. Perhaps it is more than a bit naively idealistic of me to say that I refuse to have my life determined by material concerns. But honestly I do believe that we can always find means of supporting ourselves, well not filthy rich, but comfortable. Besides, God has provided all that we could ever need in this vast, infinite universe. We just have to work for it.

Alma thinks that the jokes they tell on radio are juvenile. Rini finds it difficult to stay up late in the evening. I guess we are all growing old. Listening to the music teenagers now are listening, I can understand how my parents call the music I listen to as noise. Ten years ago I had the idea that as people grow into adulthood, they let go of their options, often unnecessarily. Just because you grow into an adult with multiple responsibilities does not mean you have to abandon all the things that got you through childhood. All the sense of adventure, curiosity and wonder really have no expiration date.

Now, if only I can stop the students from calling me “sir”.